Chocolate chip cookie recipe for scientists

Ingredients:

1.) 532.35 cm3 gluten

2.) 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3

3.) 4.9 cm3 refined halite

4.) 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride

5.) 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11

6.) 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11

7.) 4.9 cm3 methyl ether of protocatechuic aldehyde

8.) Two calcium carbonate-encapsulated avian albumen-coated protein

9.) 473.2 cm3 theobroma cacao

10.) 236.6 cm3 de-encapsulated legume meats (sieve size #10)

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall

heat transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr, add ingredients

one, two and three with constant agitation. In a second 2-L reactor

vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm, add

ingredients four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is

homogenous. To reactor #2, add ingredient eight, followed by three

equal volumes of the homogenous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally,

add ingredient nine and ten slowly, with constant agitation. Care

must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature

rise that may be the result of an exothermic reaction. Using a screw

extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer, place the mixture piece-meal on a

316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460K oven for a period of time

that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston's first order rate

expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the

reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25C heat-transfer table,

allowing the product to come to equilibrium.

PS - don't try this at home.

Commentary: I don't recommend 316 Stainless Steel for the baking

sheet. This will only promote the formation of pure carbon compounds

along the contact area. My own preference is for two sheets of 3 mil

Al with contiguous seams and a 4mm thick enclosed air space filled

with standard atmospheric.

[Mr. Grist: Hogwash! Everyone knows that the way to prevent remediation

tasks related to the formation of pure carbon compounds, and to achieve

very low coefficients of static friction, is to use a woven glass fiber mat

encased in siloxane polymers.]